@weinerdog4life: What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, except for bears, bears will kill you.
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@kirkdiedrich: The guy behind the counter asked me what I wanted on my sub and I said a collar and restraints and now I'm not allowed in Subway.
@man_spach: It's ok Apple users, I just woke up and found a surprise Nickelback album on my BlackBerry.
@TitansHomer: Failed biology because apparently the answer to "what is commonly found in cells?" Isn't "Blacks and Mexicans"