@ReeseButCallMeV: What genius named it a "news feed" on Facebook and not "bullshit"?!
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@deardilettante: [ first date ] Me. Do you take drugs? Him. I never touch them. Me. Perfect. Can I have a urine sample?
@Jandalize: There's no way to look cool when the doctor walks into your exam room just as you're blowing up a rubber glove.