@junejuly12: What idiot called it "salad" and not "la sad"
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@forcemajeure40: Apparently when I'm at Olive Garden I'm family. So why did they call the cops when I left without paying? My family never makes me pay.
@squirrel74wkgn: [sitting in van] Robber 1: Ready? Robber 2: Let's do this! Me: How do I...*trying to open egg container of pantyhose*...open this?