@SuperJuanderer: What idiot called them swordfish instead of... oh, no, wait, actually that's pretty good.
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@DarthSteveus: Jehovah's witnesses don't celebrate Halloween...I guess they don't appreciate random people coming up to their doors.
@IvoryGazelle: Well, actually, FBI is not an acronym; it's an initialism, because you can't pronounce it as a word. Mom: This is why you have no friends.
@runolgarun: "Sorry, I fail to see how I 'misled' you when my profile CLEARLY says I'm 'a total cat person'?" - half-cat/half-person being after bad date
@shegotagronk: If you're ever interested in having a near death experience just tell a girl she's not hot enough to be that crazy.