@agathagotstoned: What if cats are born with names & the fact that we call them names that aren't those names is the reason they act irrationally towards us?
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@QwertyJones3: So what do you do for a living? "I'm in the Secret Service" Wow, you didn't keep that secret too well did you
@iwearpajamas: I've been working on a new type of martial arts that involves the taking of money from Hispanics. TakeJuan'sdough.
@Super_Cynthia: [auditions for laundry detergent commercials just so I can splash brightly colored food on myself on purpose]