@DaveWeasel: If you don't like the way you look naked, remember; by the time you have your clothes off, its the other person's problem.

@AimeeHelene1: Over all these years, you'd think I'd remember how important the "L" in clock is...especially when asking mom if I can borrow dad's.

@Quartzjixler: Hey middle-aged people who suddenly change your first name--screw you. I'm calling you what I've been calling you for the last 10 years.

@mortimermaiden: *signing sign in sheet* (to myself): This will be worth a lot once I'm famous. Hospital Nurse: Alright let's get that pea out of your ear.

@IncrediblyRich: Mufasa means King. So their parents literally named their sons King and Garbage. No wonder Scar wanted everyone dead.