@duplicitron: When God made raccoons he was like do you want to be an old timey burglar or a trash digger. Too slow. You're both now.
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@zbinski: The best thing about owning a Smart Car is if you get too drunk at the bar you can just carry it home.
@KeetPotato: judge: "you have chosen to defend yourself, is that correct?" me: [muffled from inside full suit of armour] "that's correct"