@bourgeoisalien: when I hit 45 I'm going to start sleeping in a coffin. let's be honest, my lifestyle choices have been questionable
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@isabelzawtun: Gary Numan is 13 days older than Gary Oldman. I don't even know what to believe any more
@BuckyIsotope: *shows up to date with broken nose* "What happened?" Hurt myself playing football "How?" Threw the controller at a wall and it bounced back
@BlindVigil: Fact: men are never too busy for sex. It's been clinically proven, 9 out of 10 men will find time for sex while fleeing a burning building.
@MelvinofYork: I just told my boss that "STFU" stands for "Sincere Thanks For Understanding" and it's REALLY important that none of you tell him otherwise