@VaguelyFunnyDan: When I saw "likes music" on her dating profile, I almost fell out of my chair. Because I also like music. Holy shit she likes good food too!
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@Mindless4Miles: I just want to be rich enough one day to name my kid after an Australian mammal or something found in my spice rack.
@IamEnidColeslaw: welcome to Olive Garden! when you're here, you're family. sit up straight. have you gained weight? why can't you be more like your sister
@ohpegah: *thinks every animal is a type of dog* *sees a cat* scratch dog *sees a parrot* talk dog *sees a worm* spaghetti dog