@vikkaroni: When I say ditto after someone tells me they love me, it doesn't mean I love them. It means I love me too.
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@daemonic3: [shark tank] "Hi, what's your product idea?" Product? [holding bucket of live fish] I'm here to see the tank of sh-... I've made a mistake
@summerlvn82: *I take out the car keys* Him: Where are you going? Me: Who knows? I'm a wild creature that can't be tamed, I could end up anywhere Him: Me: Him: Me: Walgreens.
@SortaBad: "I'm excited for the continental breakfast" *sees a buffet just full of ice cubes* "What the..." Sign: Today's Continent is Antartica