@HogwartsLogic: If you ever feel bad about your procrastination, Harry had three month to figure out the egg clue and still did it the night before

@neiltyson: Exterminators: The only profession in which you put yourself out of business by being really good at your job.

@JhonRules: *dumps Gatorade on an alligator* How does your family taste you green piece of shit

@MartiSchodt: What do we want? DRESSES WITH POCKETS! How do we want them? FILLED WITH SNACKS! What kind of snacks? PREFERABLY A REFRESHING MIX OF SALTY AND SWEET BUT WE'RE NOT TOO PICKY FOCUS ON THE POCKETS

@JennyJohnsonHi5: I think it's fun how Hollywood gets to make as many Superman movies as they want until they get it right.