@joeljeffrey: When I'm at the mall, I carry a purse around so people think I have a girlfriend
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@iGreenMonk: The only reason why i am fat is because a tiny body could not store all this huge personality.
@xLiserx: 1 of the 7 newly discovered planets has already been declassified after discovering it was merely Pluto wearing high heels & sunglasses.
@emireecraire: Not sure if the bulb for my check engine light finally burned itself out or if my car magically fixed itself, but I'm going with the latter
@oakhillbargrill: - How was school? 4: Trenton said his dad likes to go outside and fight lions - laughs - oh honey - nobody would name their kid Trenton