@gtfml: When someone tells me they're a bodybuilder, I always ask "Not the Dr. Frankenstein kind, right?" because you can never be too careful.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@looktothepickle: If you love something set it free. *releases 4 year old son into downtown New York City*
@gitson_shiggles: Still trying to convince my boss that I'm just using beer-flavoured toothpaste.
@hunz74: My twins hate to brush their teeth. So I just convinced them that it's fun to brush someone else's teeth. Problem solved.
@TheBeerGuy_: *connects a taser to doorbell to avoid human contact
@IamEnidColeslaw: okay Mary that guy just smiled at you play it cool oh my god he's coming over here play it cool play it cool HI THERE I'M WEARING TWO BRAS
COMMENTS