@sadmonsters: When Ted Cruz kisses a baby, its parents have to throw it out and start over.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@InternetHippo: groundhog: sorry guys, 6 more weeks of winter everyone (sunbathing in february): ok
@iamk1ts: As confused as an atheist who's stuck behind a car that isn't moving at a green light & has a bumper sticker that says 'Honk if you love God
@Izianikapani: "I refuse to be part of an apartheid system that reveres whiteness and segregates those of colour" "Just do the damn laundry"
@djdarrellripley: Me: OMG, I haven't seen you in so long! Her: We've never met. Me: That long huh?