@CulturedRuffian: When you're watching Scooby-Doo and the scary part comes on.
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@ladyignoble: Note to younger women: Remember, men are always after just one thing: your snacks. Do not leave the refrigerator unlocked.
@Thomas1774Paine: Nine months from now -- when there's a baby boom in Hawaii -- you'll know who took the incoming missile warning seriously.
@Fred_Delicious: "Dad can we get a puppy?" "No but we can get a submarine if you like?" [2 hours later 3000m beneath the pacific] "dad I should be at school"