@Home_Halfway: Whenever anyone asks me where I grew up I point to a random spot in the room and say "Over there."
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@dshack8: Me: Can u send me those documents? Coworker: Yes, but u can actually get them by-- Me: Nope, don't try teaching me to fish. Not interested.
@NYC_Blonde: Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know which one of your friends your ex is going to sleep with next
@Dil_Tron: [bar closing time] Do you wanna come over to my place? Her (flirtatious af): oh yeah Ok hold on.. *dials phone* Mom? Can you pick me up now?
@aka_fatman: [Scene: Cloud City. Two men fight each other with lightsabers] Mario: You-a kill my father! Wario: No. I am-a your father. Mario: Mama-mia!