@ComedicBust: Whenever I kill an ant, I always assume a surviving ant tells the rest of the ants and they have a meeting on how to kill me in my sleep.
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@causticbob: I went for a job interview. The bloke asked, "Where do you see yourself in 10 yrs time?" "Same as now - in photos and mirrors," I replied
@Merman_Melville: Why does the couple at the beginning of a scary movie always have to be happy & sexy why can't it be like, Pat & Deb, 56 & 54, IBS sufferers
@ABostonTwit: Walk into the club like whatup OWW Walk into the mace like what DAMN Walk into the sword like wha *dies* *flunks gladiator school*