@shanethevein: Whenever I leave a fancy restaurant I tell the people coming in "I recommend the squirrel".
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@Kali_Mura: I'm beginning to suspect that my boyfriend is not really a ninja & that he moved out nine month ago.
@missekay: Hey guys, remember when you could still refer to your knees as right and left instead of good and bad? Good times.
@Jayson_Two_time: An app.. An app that reminds you, no matter how ugly you are.. someone far far away wants to bang you. -Twitters new slogan