@notthat_1: Whenever someone talks to me, I freak out because I forget people can see me.
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@pixelatedboat: *Bashar al-Assad pulls the fake handshake/hair slick move on Trump* Dems: Yesssssss! Assad is bae now!
@WilliamRodgers: Chief Exec: Any Ideas? Writer 1: Talking Animals! Writer 2: How about a Princess? Writer 3: Kill the parents! -Brainstorming at Disney
@AndyAsAdjective: This is probably a controversial take but I think the sanitation worker responsible for garbage collection on Sesame Street should be fired.