@biggsmoke814: Where's Jesus when you need him. There's only 2 fish sticks left and I've got company coming.
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@InternetHippo: Me (bumping into someone): Oh no, I’m sorry. Sorry. So very sorry Talent scout for brand’s social media job: Young man, what’s your name
@TheAlexP: * wishes on shooting star " the wish you have wished for has already been taken, please try again"
@Donna_McCoy: The dietitian told me peanut butter is healthy if I eat it with something low-calorie, so I chose a spoon.