@biggsmoke814: Where's Jesus when you need him. There's only 2 fish sticks left and I've got company coming.
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@TrainedHedonist: We're out of duct tape, craft glue, and frozen orange juice because I made a sandwich while I was drunk last night.
@Social_Mime: When I want to trim down my friend's list on FB I give my opinion and let nature do the rest.