@warhorse76: Who invented Bull Riding? Hey, I'm gonna hop on that 2,000 pound pissed off animal...Time me.
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@TheRolo: I almost got ran over by joggers. I saved myself by pretending to be a stop light. I got away while they jogged in place.
@gogglepossum: [2 monkeys in a bath] Monkey 1: OOOHH OOHH AHH AHHH AHAH!! Monkey 2: If it's too hot Colin, put some cold water in
@platinum2000: [Confessional Booth] Me: I can't do anything right. Priest: Please get off of my lap.
@sarcasticmommy4: It isn't until your kids start talking back that you realize dogs would've been a better option.