@velvettusk: Who the hell called them deadbeat dads instead of negli-gents?
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@IamEnidColeslaw: "911, what is your emergency?" I got stuck in a beaded curtain "Again?" SEND HELP
@tiffstevenson: Boyf said I look really pretty when I'm concentrating...I realised its cos I'm quiet! Either way it's the last time I let him watch me poo
@ShittingtonUK: Disliking the social justice crowd is to hating social justice as disliking the song "We Are the World" is to hating starving children.
@GABBYdaAngSaya: Prisoner: You inked Me: *thinking about my "I hate prisoners" back tattoo* No why