@FrizerkaSandra: Whoever said you cannot live off of wine and cheese alone did not try hard enough.
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@philyuck: The Molotov cocktail is of course named after Vitaly Molotov, an 18th century Russian industrialist who exploded after being thrown at a car
@lalastrailer: If I had a dollar for everyone I work with who's dumber than me, I'd have $11 cause I work for a small company.
@blaha_Who: You don't know pissed off until she tells you to go sleep on the couch, an you take all the covers with you.
@SondraDeeMe: My Medical Emergency Contact is a girl from college who promised she'd pluck any stray hairs off my face if I slipped into a coma.