@T_Bonezzz: Whoever spelled the word Receipt was a friggin idiopt
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@squirrel74wkgn: I'm a 40 yr old man sitting at a Café with my eyes closed, squirting packets of mayo from under the table at the window as people walk by.
@kjoy1019: If I don't clean my house soon, someone is going to bring in blindfolded ppl for a Frebreeze commercial.
@Sickayduh: "That damn Lassie said Timmy fell down a ruffruffruff" "Relax, honey. I'm sure she means well"
@NoogsCorner: Me: It actually takes light around 8 minutes to travel from the Sun to Earth. Her: Umm light is instant. Everyone knows that. Me: Go home.