@GrandadJFreeman: Why can't the T-Rex clap it's hands? Because it's extinct.
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@jwoodham: "How dare you accuse us of cheating?" said the Patriots, struggling to get a jersey on the giant robot tiger that Katy Perry rode in on.
@Jenny4ashley: If you had to choose between voting for Trump or getting into the water with sharks, would you dive in or do a cannon ball?
@Reverend_Scott: [school] Ok class, what was Abraham Lincoln most famous for doing? Billy? "Abolishing slavery." And... "Slaying vampires." Very good.
@living_marble: None for me. I'll eat when I'm dead "You don't understand how that saying works, do you?" I'll understand how the saying works when I'm dead