@polyhumorous: Why did it have to be the dog? I have the hubby insured for $1.5 million.
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@TheTalkingPipe: Make a friend today. Give a complete stranger a big, long hug. If they happen to get mad, tell the police a guy on twitter said you could.
@SteveKoehler22: Single and divorced men in their 40's prefer women at their own maturity level. That explains why they date women half their age.
@Mindless4Miles: Me: "Breath mint?" Her: "Sure." M: "Don't mean to offend." H: "None taken." M: "Great. Good to hear. Care for a push up bra?"
@electrolemon: yesterday at the mall a woman asked for my opinion between two men's shirts and immediately went to check out with the one i didn't choose