@careworn: Why do people insist on saying "You're next" to me at weddings? Do they not realize how serial killery that is?
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@_Tempo11: He said he wanted to "put more than just words in my mouth" and I was like "I hope you mean hamburgers."
@_Tempo11: If you leave your dog tied up outside a corner store I'm walking it. No need to ask. Be back soon.
@Audenary: (WW1 1915) ENGLISH GENERAL: Plan? ENGLISH LIEUTENANT: Well, the trenches can be used to- ENGLISH MAJOR: to symbolise man's emptiness, yes...