@panmidwest: Why do they call it multiple personality disorder and not being a people-person?
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@Yankeegiant72: After I dislodged my head from the drywall, I had 2 thoughts: 1) Wow, this new Metallica song is really good and 2) I may need new drywall
@TheTweetOfGod: As a rule, if the number of genders allowed to drive in your country is less than two, you live in an awful country.
@Scott_A_Gilmore: Came home from work early and caught my inflatable girlfriend cheating on me with the beachball.