@birbigs: Why does Garfield hate Mondays? He doesn't have a job.
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@dafloydsta: Me: You'll always be my girl. Daughter: Even if I break stuff? Me: Depends on which stuff.
@sixthformpoet: If another day goes by without a Matthew, Mark, Luke and John forming a boyband called New Testament, I'm going to give up on everything.
@Smooheed: *signs into Skype meeting with very important clients* *tries to sound incredibly intelligent* *gets attacked by moth* *falls off chair*