@Darlainky: Why don’t Elvis impersonators call themselves the next best King?
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@InternetHippo: [creating x-men] A wheelchair-bound visionary leads his people through a major conflict "That's literally WWII" Ok then…one guy has claws
@lisaxy424: Going to sleep: It's so cold in here, I'm totally wearing these socks to bed Middle of the night: GET THESE DEVIL FOOT GLOVES OFF ME
@KellyMeldrum: My kids are so aware that I'm a bad driver that if I start the car before they have their seatbelts on, they cry.