@BadassBarbie11: Why don't they just use a 3 year old with a drum set as an enhanced interrogation technique?
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@bidenandobama: Biden: Think about it like an investment opportunity. Obama: I'm not buying you an above ground pool, Joe.
@Book_Krazy: Batman: Why so down? Aquaman: People think I'm not a real superhero. I'm tired of being walked all over. *[Jesus enters] Aquaman: Dammit!
@truegritrumble: WIFE: Can you send these party invites out? ME: Sure *throws them out window* WIFE: Did you- ME: If they're meant to come, they'll come.
@Mr_Kapowski: Guys, Kelly Kapowski does not belong solely to me She belongs to us all She's R. Kelly