@SteveKoehler22: Why not call baby pigs "hamlets" ?
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@XplodingUnicorn: 4-year-old: What does God smell like? Me: 4-year-old: Me: Nachos. 4-year-old: With cheese?
@BooFricketyHoo: Dried up sea monkeys taste nothing like chicken. Related: Never ever put your kids seamonkey packets near your cup o'noodles packets. Ever.
@ValeeGrrl: My son has a play-date today & the mom said to dress him in holiday colors so he's in all black & I'm telling her we worship the dark lord.