@SteveKoehler22: Why not call baby pigs "hamlets" ?
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@johngaysee: If I were Luke Skywalker it would have taken me about six minutes to turn R2-D2 into a bong.
@batsly: I hate when I walk in on another guy in a bathroom stall and, since we're both on our phones, neither of us notices until I sit on his lap.
@CornOnTheGoblin: Art Teacher: your drawings are due tomorrow me: [hours later] maybe add in some grapes police sketch artist: ..a bowl of fruit attacked you?
@HeatherLuvsYou: A foreign kid asked me how to speak English the other day, so I teached him some.