@eliyudin: "WITH OUR POWERS COMBINED!" "EARTH" "WIND" "WATER" "FIRE" "HEART" "SELF-LOATHING" get outta here Eli "SORRY"
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@JakeNicholas: There's a man at the mall wearing cargo pants and a fanny pack, who I believe is in the process of becoming a suitcase.
@casual_koala: Don't get upset if you hit a lot of red lights on your way to work. You'd turn red too if you had to change in the middle of the street.
@NicestHippo: You had a flat tire on the highway? What was that like? [cut to: me crying helplessly until AAA arrives] Your survival instincts take over
@DirtMcTurd: "Heres your social security card, you need it forever! Its made of paper, don't laminate it. Good luck." -The Government