@meganamram: Women who get kidnapped while jogging: you're not jogging fast enough
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@liv_thatsme: You know you're old when you see the neighbor's dog chasing some punk teenagers & you root for the dog.
@Reverend_Scott: [Shop class] Satan: Whatcha makin'? God: Trust. Man can use it to form lasting bonds and friendships. What you making? Satan: A bong.
@ibid78: A three hour long movie adaptation of pages 74 and 75 of the Hobbit? Friggin count me in.