@punmagnate: Worm CEO cuts workforce in half, doubles productivity
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@kevinrowe1: Doctor: Between 1 and 10, describe how much pain are you in? Me: Is married a number? That's how I get the good meds...
@TattleTSister: Halloween is the perfect time to trick people into believing you aren't really going to use that ice pick you're carrying around.
@GibJimson: Being the tallest person at work, leads me to believe they hired me because they were short staffed.