@ddsmidt: X-rays are dangerous, they were probably less harmful when they were just rays, but after the breakup...
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@NicestHippo: "Can you explain this Gap in your work history?" Yes that's when I worked for the popular clothing retailer
@Sanbel11: If he's a nice guy and treats you well, does it really matter what colour his Maserati is?
@kiel_phillips: JELLYFISH: *to friend* Want to see something disgusting? Watch this. *stings person* FRIEND: That wasn't dis... JELLYFISH: Wait a minute.