@Jmboyd58: Yes, I absolutely want to hear about your cat's medication.
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@AimeeHelene1: Wanted to respond with "Perfect!" but accidentally sent "Pervert!" That's my cue to leave. And sorry, Steve, you're probably not a pervert.
@moooooog35: One time I brought my kids to work with me and now my boss is way more tolerant of my drinking.
@TheToddWilliams: Kid: WAAAHH! MY TOY IS BROKEN!! Dad: Nothing a little duct tape won't fix... Kid: mfflr..frrrr..strnnn