@LackOfShame: YOU ASKED IF YOU COULD PET HER, NOT IF SHE BITES, MEGAN.
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@Phantasmagoriax: If I ever die, my phone better go with me or there will be some pissed off people at my funeral.
@ShutUpThatsWho: [son falls over & hurts himself] ME: aww poor kid, he needs a little THC WIFE: don't you mean TLC? ME: [huge bong rip] he needs what now?
@TheDeadfishSays: I sit in the corner eating my tortillas completely confused by this salsa class.