@simoncholland: You can just start calling yourself an olympic hopeful. You don't have to fill out a form or anything.
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@desijourno: When in doubt, ignore an unknown number on your mobile, never hit Reply All, and always wear clothes when you step out of your house.
@MethShart: David Hasselhoff saves money on tailored shirts by not ordering the first 5 buttons.
@WilliamAder: I wonder if the Three Wise Men said to Jesus, "Just to be clear, these gifts are for your birthday AND Christmas."
@ibid78: I wish softcore horror was a genre. Like, "LOOK OUT BEHIND YOU IT'S A KITTEN! OH THANK GOD IT'S JUST A FEATHER."