@pharmasean: You can lead a horse to water You can leave your horse behind. Cuz your horse don't dance n if he don't dance then he ain't no horse of mine
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@thisislizz: Dear Tech Support, I twied to puth my tongue in tha USthB port again. Canth you helpf?
@bobvulfov: [GOP debate] JOHN KASICH: my dad was a mailman so i understand our nation's struggles MODERATOR: what how JK: i went through everyone's mail
@AristotlesNZ: Guy stole my bike so I got in a cab & said follow that guy! He said sure, whats his twitter name? We laughed & hi-fived & I need a new bike