@JasonLastname: You can lead a horse to waterbed, but you can't make it snuggle.
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@david8hughes: [phone rings] "Is your refrigerator running?" *looks over at fridge holding a lighter up to a spoon* "I don't know what he's doing anymore."
@MsNitnots: Girl in front of me on the bus just sent a text that was like a novel and the response was like a word and now even I'm pissed off about it.
@SortaBad: "I'm dreaming about mashed potatoes" Oh because Thanksgiving is tomorrow "No, just a normal mashed potato dream like usual"