@TheCatWhisprer: You can tell a lot about a person based on what they use as a gender-neutral singular pronoun.
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@Ivsy01: Ed Sheeran: Darling, I will be loving you 'til we're 70... What girls hear: You're gonna dump me at 71.
@_troyjohnson: *loads dryer* Fitted Sheet: HE'S BURNING US ALIVE! COME, SHIRT! COME, PANTS! HOP IN MY BOSOM AND I WILL FORM A PROTECTIVE BALL OF MOISTURE!
@Breadery: When we first dated I thought your freckles were dots of inexcusable cuteness. Now I can see how joined up they draw a pentagram.