@thatUPSdude: You do understand "Tan" and "Orange" are 2 very different colors right?
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@ibid78: Bro do you even watch The Notebook and weep softly, mourning the eternal nature of love juxtaposed against the fallibility of memory, bro?
@flashember: DISH FATHER: You can NEVER see that spoon again! *daughter dish starts sobbing* [outside the window, Spoon is thinking] we leave tonight
@PerfectPending: Please do not compare your dog problems to parenting. Your dog cannot say your name 3,258 times in a day.
@EyeSeeYou619: [country music plays in elevator] ME: I hate Toby Keith HIM: This isn't Toby Keith ME:(leans into his face) I don't give a shit who this is