@SteveSuckington: You drop ONE baby and everyone's all like, "Quit juggling babies Steve. You're the worst babysitter ever!"
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@longwall26: Me: How did Bruce and Alfred build the Batcave all by themselves? The Lord: I meant any questions about the mysteries of existence
@sixfootcandy: [family brunch] Sister: We'd love you to be our daughter's godmother. Me: No thank you. Please pass the syrup.
@NamestartswithZ: MENTOR: I am now sponsored by Cheetos, but it shan't affect my wise counsel ME: How can I become- MENTOR: Dangerously cheesy? Glad you asked
@Amusitr0n: Pizza Hut Employee: I'm sorry but we don't deliver bog grass. I'm not even sure what that is. Moose: [incoherent bellowing]