@_iTrevii: You gotta Snapchat, dm, and text your girl all @ the same time. That way if you piss her off in 1 convo, you still have two lives left.
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@pixelatedboat: Doctors recommend that you drink 8 glasses of water a day and don't fall out of a helicopter
@ShipInTheKnight: Twitter is like a conversation at the water cooler. If the water cooler was full of vodka. And you could smoke. And the boss was out of town
@mattZillaaaa: Tomorrow is my company's office holiday potluck. I really hope they like the french fries I found between my car seat