@briangaar: You had me at "we've got the place surrounded"
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@AsaAkira: A lot of you are calling me "mom" lately. Is it cause I'm old? Or cause you respect me? I hope for your sake it's cause I'm old.
@DiamondLou69: Apparently the drunk guy at the urinal next to me is under the impression that I was stung in the leg by a jellyfish.
@isabelzawtun: Getting pretty tired of Vin Diesel hopping into the passenger seat yelling "PUNCH IT" when I am just trying to eat my lunch alone in my car
@Fred_Delicious: [Girl takes off her clothes] "You have had sex before right?" [Me, in a suit of armor & holding a cauliflower] ... "no actually"