@ValeeGrrl: You have to admire husband's focus as he plays on his iPad while I furiously chop carrots tapping out "I hate you" in morse code w my knife.
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@IamEnidColeslaw: shoutout to Disney for giving me unrealistic expectations about love, talking animals and my singing voice
@ComedicBust: As soon as I get to a party, I start saying goodbye; that way I'm out of there within 4 hours.
@JohnLyonTweets: Nephew: Do you like Minecraft? Me: [trying to seem cool] I am interested in how mines are built, yes.