@prozdkp: you know a tweet’s gotten spread around when random catholics get mad at you “PLEASE DON’T GO TO MASS IF YOU’RE NOT CATHOLIC” my..my wife wanted me to go, you turkey, catholic mass is not my go-to choice for a FUN NIGHT OUT
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@BoomBoomBetty: A Harvard professor says I should only eat six French fries per serving. When I have PMS I can easily eat six Harvard professors in one sitting though.
@refreshingslurp: me on ellen ellen: so i heard you love guillotining the rich me: ya (the studio is filled with the terrified screams of investment bankers) me: omg ellen you didn’t
@FatherWithTwins: I called my son’s school to see if they would take him a week early and apparently they “don’t do that” and I “need to stop calling.”
@DanMentos: shaggy: hey scoob where's my burger scooby: ruh roh shaggy: great danes only live 8 years you know scooby: ruck roo