@daemonic3: "You know that's not even a word, right?" I said, condescendingatively
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@BriarSlyMadness: Believing that you are popular or "famous" on twitter... ...is like believing you are rich because you won a game of Monopoly.
@marcia_bee: I was going to suggest Twitter to have a live Nativity scene but I think it's going to be impossible. A virgin and 3 wise men? On here?!
@SaraMansford: So I called up the Captain, please bring me my wine. He said: "ma'am, this is a cruise. Please don't call me again if there's no emergency"
@DamienFahey: If the car behind me honks while waiting for my parking space at the mall, I turn off my car and visibly start a rubik's cube.