@_Awwsomeness_: You know you're single when the only calls you get at night are Nature's.
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@CatherineLMK: I'm dressing for the weather I desperately want, not the weather I currently have.
@tuckerflodman: [1st date] -I'm a fish whisperer. Wow, what does that mean? -*whispers* Fish. Oh... Haha um what do you- -*whispers right in her ear* Fish.
@TheMichaelRock: Something you may have in your house right now could be killing your children. We'll tell you about it in 2 days. - Local News